A Coorgi Wedding.

India, the land of colors, music, dance, art, food, festivals, different yet united people. India, the land of musical naming ceremonies, funerals, and of course weddings. And a small part of India, yet integral part of the Indian in me, Coorg. The land of Kaveri, coffee, pepper, cardamom, warriors, beautiful women, guns, traditions that today make the foundation of the Indian army, handsome men, pork (pandi) curry and Rum & coke! The land where I spent some of my best childhood days. Summer holidays at your grandparents place, where you are pampered, fed as if you've been starving the entire year and where you can play until 8 pm! Every year after our exams my Father used to take his annual vacation of 30 days and the entire family came down to Coorg. Visiting relatives, playing with the coffee labourers kids was a norm. My maternal grandparents place had and still has a 'chulla'. My favourite-est place in the entire house. It has a cozy corner right next to it where I still go and cuddle up and read and gossip with my grand-mom and mom. Coorg, rightly called the “Scotland of India”. Weddings, was an essential part of our summer vacations! I love weddings and always will. I love the buzz around it. I love the family get togethers. I love the music and dance it is surrounded by. I love the glamour associated with it. I love buying new clothes, I love dressing up, I love the excitement, I love the jewelery matching exercise, I love the food, I love meeting people, I love the planning and the confusion in spite of the planning! Basically, I love everything around Weddings. Indian weddings are all this and much more. There's masti and mazaa, there's badmashi, there's chidna-chidana. There's laughter and there are tears. I guess thats why I love Bollywood movies. Because it's an extended version of Indian weddings :) And I love Coorgi weddings. Not a lot of people know that Coorgi weddings, though predominantly Hindu weddings, have extremely different customs and traditions. People find it hard to believe that there are no pandits and no pheras. But there's a lot more! A Coorgi wedding can be divided into three parts. Actually four, including the fun third part :) The first is a ceremony called Oorkudva. Literally meaning “ The Village gets together”, Oorkudva takes place on the eve of the wedding. Originally the purpose was for all the villagers to help the family with preparations for the wedding. The women sit together and cut and chop vegetables for the weddings dishes, while gossiping and talking about their respective attires. The men, helping with the other necessary arrangements, tiny tasks, that do not in themselves constitute a whole but need to be taken care of for a successful wedding. Of course, they make some million trips to the bar. Alcohol, another important part of a Coorgi wedding. Nothing starts without alcohol. No puja, no ceremony, nothing. We offer alcohol to our ancestors at the start of the wedding preparations asking them for their guidance and blessings for the ceremony and the to-be couple. The bar, that starts at Oorkudva doesn't shut till the wedding is over and the couple is taken to their bridal suite. Depending on whether it is a single Muhurtam or a Dampati Muhurtam, the Oorkudva is single and separate or done jointly for the girl's and the boy's side. The bride and the groom are blessed by their mothers and they also seek the blessings of Cauvery, our deity. While a Coorgi song is being sung about the groom/bride's life up till now. An interesting part of Coorgi weddings is that the groom is as dressed up as the girl, full with jewels et all. The Oorkudva is basically a bachelor/bachelorette party, except that the entire village is invited. It's as much fun, if not more! The youngsters high on the excitement, preparations, pretty girls and good looking boys around, dance the night away to Coorgi dance music called “Valaga”.The alcohol, also adds to the 'high'. A sumptuous Coorgi meal followed by more dancing ends the night. The second part and the next day begins with a small puja done by the Groom and Bride. They are dressed and taken to their respective mantaps in case of a single muhurtam. The concept of a 'Best Man' and 'Bridesmaid' holds for a Coorgi wedding. Before entering the mantap, another significant ceremony takes place. 6 banana stalks are placed outside which are to be cut by the Groom's maternal uncles. Only after this can the groom be taken to the mantap, where he is blessed by all those who are invited for the wedding. In the afternoon, the groom gets ready to go get his bride home. Now the fun Third part! A huge bus is organised and the groom, escorted by all his cousins and aunts and uncles and not to forget the band playing the Valaga, gets on to the bus. Then begins a journey, which is a college bus trip multiplied by a million. There's music, there's dance, there are jokes about the groom's last few hours of bachelordom. And of course, like always there's alcohol that adds to the atmosphere. The bus is stopped on the way, the party gets down and dances and drinks and continues on their journey. Once we reach the bride's place, there is another round of banana stalk cutting, this time by the Bride's maternal uncles in honour of the groom and his relatives. The party is welcomed and the groom taken to the mantap. The bride then escorted by her cousins, looking coy and shy, climbs the mantap and is seated next to the groom. Another round of blessings happen and then the bride and the groom exchange garlands and the groom puts the mangalsutra for the bride and they are declared married!The family elders then explain to the newly wed couple, a few ways of living of their new life, almost like wedding vows being read out. When the Groom is taking his Bride down the stairs, the bride's cousin, dressed in the ethnic dress, stops him. He says, “You can't take her, she is mine, I love her and we were supposed to get married.” Now the groom moves to the side and his best man and his uncles 'negotiate' with the cousin and request him to let the groom take the bride home. The cousin then asks for money, land, and what not and says he will not let the procession pass unless his demands are met. Finally after a round of heavy-duty negotiations and winnings, the cousin moves aside and the procession continues. The extent of his winnings depends on the bargaining skills of the cousin, and some are quite talented at it. It is fun to watch and listen to the tete-a-tete that takes place between the Best man and the cousin. Another bus journey back home, and this time with the bride. You can imagine the amount of fun it is. It is already late, but the cousins insist on stopping the bus and dancing on the road. The bride finally gets home and meets her in-laws (who were not with the party that went to get the bride home) The bridesmaid and a few of her cousins and aunts and uncles escort her to her new home. Now the final and fourth part of the wedding. The Ganga Puja. Some call it inhuman, some say it's unfair. But we call it fun! And more reason to dance and drink! The first duty that the bride performs in her new house is to draw two pots of water and carry it home to the kitchen. There are some other unmarried girls with her. They all stand in a line, with pots of water on their heads. The difficult part is, they are not allowed to move. A herd of youngsters (I mean it!),basically everyone dances in front of them. Mind you the bar is still open! And the bride stands holding the pots on her head for hours! It can go up to 6 hours. And they make you stand in spite of rain or snow. It's all of course in good humor. If the bride is sporting enough, it's a lot of fun for both the sides! And finally when the crowd decides to be merciful they allow her to carry the water in and thus ends Ganga Puja, the final custom. You need to attend one Coorgi wedding to experience the fun! It's worth it. After a long time, I attended a complete one this time. My first trip to Coorg after I joined my first job. The Wedding was all the fun I described above and even though I have tried to put it all in words, I am sure I can not capture the actual feeling and experience of a Coorgi wedding! And of course, apart from all this, this time something else happened... or did it?