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July 11 - hello London.

London and I have a love affair. It started the first time I visited here in 2015.  The city has always fascinated me. Part of that fascination was Shah Rukh Khan's DDLJ and part of it was pure intuition that it was a city that I would love anyway. I can not think of any other place in the world that has that special place in my heart that London does. I love Bali and Italy (anywhere in Italy) will always feel like home to me and they're more like soulmates. But London is a passionate love affair that reignites everytime I arrive here. I forget just how much I love it until I'm driving down from the airport just looking at it's gorgeouness or when I first walk the streets, heading into some tiny coffee shop for a cuppa.

The city makes me happy, it makes me very very happy. I am fortunate enough to have returned to it every year the last five years & fallen even more in love. When people ask me if I would like to move here to live & work, I don't quite know how to answer that question. Because my immediate answer would be a yes, but the weather & the crazy high rents would most probably be unsustainable for me eventually. I've only visited the city in the summer, when everything is nicer, everyone is happier & there's a sense of life all around. I've heard the exact opposite is true for the winter. I'm a sun child, I need it to feel happy and be active. If I don't see the sun for a week, chances are I would be super cranky, irritated and borderline depressed. So even if I figured out the high rents bit & made enough to live comfortably, the weather would be a non-negotiable for me. Or so I think. A part of me believes that I will live here for a bit sometime soon & that'll be a good experiment for London & me. We can then test if the relationship is based solely on short passionate encounters or has the gravitas to withstand cloudy dark (& rainy) days and nights.

Bergerac ended as suddenly as it began. From the frenzy of not getting the visa to getting it, changing my tickets, flying out to London and ferrying it to Cain, followed by a 10 hour car ride to the quietness & ease of my departure today. Either it is my dealing with goodbyes  emotionally character or the fact that Bergerac and I had learnt our lessons from each other & were eager to go live those lessons in the real world.

A lazy morning routine followed by three delicious french toasts (that the french make with a day old bread!), some packing, a cup of coffee and a few emails later I was ready to go.
I had cooked a Thai meal for the team at Chez Boileau and we had leftovers that tasted divine today (Asian food always tastes better the next day!).

Today's post is a bit erratic because the last two days have been erratic. With mentally preparing to leave a house that had been my home for two months, leaving people I had shared every waking minute with & also leaving Bergerac, a gorgeous little town that changed what France and the French mean to me. My perception went from being arrogant unfriendly non-smiling people to friends who were patient with me, drivers who tolerated my slow cycling speeds, cheese sellers who smiled when I approached them and bakers who greeted me with a hearty Bonjour when I entered their shops. Bergerac and I will meet again, of that I am sure. So while I say it was easy for me to leave today, I would be lying if I did not acknowledge the emotions I have been feeling since Sunday this week - purely of the fact that I'm leaving in 3-2-1 day/days dawning upon me.

I feel I haven't done justice to the blog entries this year because I haven't written about 'heavy'  things - topics that one can get philosophical about. But I guess my life since I left my job has been about following the ease that life offers & toughening up when it asks us to. Hence the topics on this year's series go from being sombre to hearty to downright everyday journal entries, like today.

This morning before eating my pancake that Colleen had lovingly prepared for me as I rolled out of bed at 9 am, I closed my eyes and said a prayer & when I opened my eyes I saw Colleen serving me a second pancake with the words - ask and you shall receive. I guess if there is one theme I can attribute to this year's posts it's to believe in the largeese of the Universe & in the belief that things will work out - with a few additional twists & turns.

I don't know where I read this - maybe Awakening Shakti - about how imagining, visualizing and praying for what we would like to be gifted with is important and is half the effort of achieving that goal. If we don't put in that half & don't send a message out into the Universe, how will it know what to fulfill ? I found that thought comforting, weirdly.

I was picked up at the airport by a gregarious Uber driver called Jaspal, who asked me if I was single. When I said yes, he was shocked & asked why. I honestly answered him saying 'I don't know the answer to that'. He then says - when the time is right it'll all come together. Which is true.

All in good time.

Until then, I'll continue my short love affair with London.

Goodnight.

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