They walked under a starlit sky, hand in hand, content and complete. They'd both been in love before and had been heart broken before. When you're inching close to 30, one doesn't expect a clean slate when it comes to love. So scratches et all, they still risked and took this chance - maybe this is the one they'll come out of unscathed?
She had just finished a class at her yoga studio and was on her way to the shower as she stopped by her locker to check her phone and saw his message. He was checking if she'd be up for coffee. She texted back agreeing for coffee in 30 mins. And so began their Saturday. Coffee led to a movie and the movie to dinner. Here they were walking the streets of Singapore singing Ed Sheeran's all of the stars, as the sky (and Google maps) guided them home. As he sat across the table from her, he realised, it was the first time he'd looked deep into her eyes. He told her they were his favorite feature of hers. She smiled, he wasn't the first person to say it, but she hoped he was the last to say it that way. They didn't want the night to end, and as they sat there after dinner, pulling and stretching the threads of time to make them longer, she looked around and saw that they'd found their own little sanctuary in this pretty little bistro, that fortunately for them, stayed open until late. It was 12:00am when they ordered tea. As she poured milk into her tea and watched the clouds form, she said his name and smiled to herself - and it took almost a minute for her to realise that she'd said it aloud. She blushed as she looked up to see if he had noticed. He had. She saw him watching her keenly, and there in that moment, she felt them connect.
There were a million thoughts running through each of their minds. No one could hear what they'd said to each other, because in reality they had not spoken a single word. But as their eyes met over those teacups, if you looked closely, you could see sparks. They weren't in love, not yet. This was what, only their third date?They also weren't naive enough to scream from the rooftops at this connection. What they were, was hopeful. She'd been waiting to meet someone who touched her being, whom she could open herself up to, someone she could be vulnerable enough with, someone she could risk getting hurt for. She feared karma playing payback, she'd hurt people and was now scared of being betrayed herself. Was it finally her time then? Was he going to be her lesson?
He was finally thrilled at meeting someone who he could go on a second, third and a fourth date with. And to think she'd been here all this time - how had he not noticed her? Well, technically he wasn't looking initially, and when he was, he was searching in all the wrong places. He still remembered when she had walked past him at the coffee machine, his breath deserted him mid-sentence, and he needed a moment to focus and come back to where he was in space and time. And after that, she was everywhere, he even spotted her when he walked to work.
It was 1 am by the time they left the bistro. And he told her he'd like to walk her back home. She protested meekly, he stayed a few blocks from where they were and it wouldn't make sense for him to walk all the way to her place (while completely wanting him to walk her back home). And so they walked, sharing bits and pieces of themselves - stories from the week, the year, the last couple of years and all the way back to their childhoods. They had so much to say, but then they also had these moments of complete silences and if they weren't afraid of showing the other person how much this meant to them, they would've mostly sighed out aloud.
Inside their clasped hands, they held something strong enough to withstand any challenge the world throws at them, but also fragile enough to be shattered by something unsaid - it was hope. The unchanging humid weather of Singapore that night blew a fragrant breeze, a breeze that carried this hope with wings that wanted to soar and circle the sky. But wings that weren't unfettered yet. Just not yet.
Halfway through their midnight walk, she looked at him and asked him to go back home and that she'd walk alone from here on. They were standing on the footpath under a lamppost next to a flyover. He smiled and puller her closer and kissed her. As the cars sped past them, nothing existed and yet everything did. Nothing made sense, and yet pieces of a puzzle were coming together. Time stood still, yet it also seemed to rush by. They could swear that they felt their bodies swinging to a melody, but their feet were rooted right under that lamppost, that shone on them on that breezy Singapore night.
And then under that lamppost, at the intersection of Clemenceau Ave N. and Scotts road, right next to the Newton flyover, two complete people made each other even more whole.
"when i'm away,
i will remember
how you kissed me
under the lamppost
back on 6th street
hearing you whisper
through the phone
wait for me to come home...."
~
Photograph, Ed Sheeran
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