So I just wrote a whole post and it disappeared and I'm heartbroken because there was some gorgeous stuff on it. But I changed tabs to look up this quote and lost all content, but here is the quote anyway :
And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and string and full of fire and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears. ~ Marc Anthony
Happy Bastille Day
I started writing the post saying, if I were in Bergerac right now I would be watching the fireworks from the balcony. But here I am in London and yet I feel like I'm in France watching the fireworks - almost like I am in two places at once. I feel like that sometimes !
My friend and I were making breakfast earlier today - gorgeous North African Eggs from Gordon Ramsey's cookbook - Ultimate Cooking, and we were discussing Authenticity. He quoted someone he follows - you can escape or conquer competition by authenticity, because nobody else can be a better you than you.
Now, I have heard this before. On t-shirts and self help quote Instagram accounts with 'Be you, everybody else is already taken!' Why this particular quote struck a chord with me was because of the way it looked at competition. Of course I needn't worry about competition if I were being authentic, because although people might be offering something similar to what I am, they will never be able to offer what I am, because they are not me. Hence by just the virtue of being me, I can conquer 'competition'.
In book I had read, maybe something by Elizabeth Gilbert, I chances upon a line which said pretty much the same thing as above. By denying the world of work that comes authentically and naturally to you, you are denying the world of art that only you can create and hence this piece of art will be lost to the world, because even if someone were to create something in the same realm, they wouldn't be able to do it just the way you would have. Because no one has lived your life, has your emotions, gone through your struggles or loved the way you have, succeeded or fallen the way you have or risen the way you have. Only you have done that and therefore only you can produce the world that you do.
I found that very empowering. It immediately out me on a 'oh I'm not crap, my work deserves to be seen, my voice deserves to be heard, my art deserves to be shared'. In fact one of the main reasons I wore this blog is because it's art that resonates with me. And even though other people might be saying things that are quite similar to what I am here - no one will be saying it quite exactly this way.
Since I dissed Instagram earlier in this post, I shall redeem it by quoting an account I love following : Morgan Harper Nichols and he said in one of his gorgeous posts :
"Amidst all that is changing around you, hold onto that which is beautiful and true "
Goodnight.
As I dimmed the lights of my room last night, Singapore's hot and humid air changed to a gush of strong cold wind. The curtains fluttered and made my ddlj cow bells ring. I turned and stared at them for a long time. I readjusted the laptop on my bed and plonked myself against two big pillows. My eyes closed themselves. There was a silence that was neither deafening nor lonely. It was just what silence is meant to be.... silent. And my curtains moved again, moving the bells with them. The bells took me back to Shahrukh and his movies. I opened my eyes and looked at those bells for a long long time. My mom had picked them up from Switzerland for me. I thought of her and teared up. I wanted her now. I wanted her touch. It was 10pm at home in India and at this time, after dinner and closing the kitchen, my mother, takes a shower. She comes out of the bathroom, and brings with her a waft of her talcum powder and her body lotion. That fragrance can make you forget all your worries...
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