Zendagi Migzara

​ The day had dawned filling her with fright she didn't want to let go, but it had to be tonight ​​ She closed her eyes and took a deep breath in joined her palms in prayer, bowing to the light within. With the second breath in she held him close and held him tight and with her breath out, she gave up the fight. It will not do to dwell on him anymore she'd given herself all this time and now she had to let go. She sang and danced and announced to no one 'The funeral is today, let the mourners come' They came and laid a rose on the grave said their sympathies asking her to be brave. She said nothing and watched them go she didn't utter a word didn't let it show. She welcomed the dusk and watched the sun go down hiding her duality of being a murderer and a clown. In these times of instant messages and chats she'd written him a love letter not for her, this business of stat. She had fought with her stars and arm-...

They walked under a starlit sky, hand in hand, content and complete. They'd both been in love before and had been heart broken before. When you're inching close to 30, one doesn't expect a clean slate when it comes to love. So scratches et all, they still risked and took this chance - maybe this is the one they'll come out of unscathed? She had just finished a class at her yoga studio and was on her way to the shower as she stopped by her locker to check her phone and saw his message. He was checking if she'd be up for coffee. She texted back agreeing for coffee in 30 mins. And so began their Saturday. Coffee led to a movie and the movie to dinner. Here they were walking the streets of Singapore singing Ed Sheeran's all of the stars, as the sky (and Google maps) guided them home. As he sat across the table from her, he realised, it was the first time he'd looked deep into her eyes. He told her they were his favorite feature of hers. She smiled, he wa...

She was going away again. And as she walked with her boarding pass in hand towards security check and the boarding gates, she wondered why most of her time this year was spent at airports and in flights. She didn't travel for work all that much. Most of her travel was for herself and now looking back, she was travelling to some place or the other every second weekend this year. Was it a conscious decision, or was it coincidence? It was November, she couldn't believe the year was nearing the end, here she was, another year gone by, another Christmas approaching, another flight. Like most of her travel plans, this one had been booked on a whim as well. Something in her said she had to go and she took a day to book flights and hotels and plan an itinerary and she was ready, in May, for a trip in November. As she boarded the flight, she smiled, pulled her yoga mat closer and closed her eyes for a second, and took a long deep breath and opened her eyes. As she stowed her mat ...

"​How old is your soul ?" Here Zeenat sat amongst friends and talking about old cities, the streets they once roamed, the food they gorged on and the beauty that Hyderabad was. And someone had said aloud in a story,  how old is your soul  and that pushed her mind back a million years. Almost like someone had yanked her body back, and that force had caused her to stumble and knock open a chest of memories. And once opened, all you wanted to do was inflict that hurt on yourself all over again. So while she sat in a mehfil and there was noise and chatter all around her, she grew still. And her mind, picked up every fragment of those broken dreams and placed them under a spotlight . And there it stayed under the spotlight, while she turned them around and let herself feel those times again. Almost, like she could see herself wearing what she was wearing on the day their hands had accidentally touched and as she pulled her hand back, he had looked at her and smirked an...

she stepped out of the cafe & the sun touched her face, he slid his hand in hers, & let their fingers interlace ​ and as they walked around, that sunny day, he spoke of this & that, to keep her fears at bay she'd traveled a lifetime  in a month & something in her was broken, something undone they stopped to wait at a traffic light. she looked around & wished the day to be night. she couldn't hold back and let loose the dam, the red man blurred and in her tears he swam He hugged her tight  as the cars sped by patting her head  & letting her cry. She lost herself  in his embrace letting her fears flow and hiding her face and there amongst cars white, black and blue, something held them safe tender and anew, was it love? who knew..

There he was, with his disarming smile,  that tore away all those many miles. She took a step, with her heart in hand,  and watched him draw, a line in the sand. She smiled even more as she stepped across little knowing, it was a cause she'd lost. She kissed him long with all her love and sent a short  prayer above. He flipped a coin in his head, and decided to tell her  tomorrow instead. He let this one  night go by, And let her live, in his sweet lie.

सावन बीतो जाए पिहरवा मन मेरा घबराये ऐसो गए परदेस पिया तुम चैन हमे नहीं आये मोरा सैय्याँ मोसे बोले ना मैं लाख जतन कर हारी लाख जतन कर हार रही मोरा सैय्याँ मोसे बोले ना मोरा सैय्याँ मोसे बोले ना ~ Fuzon, Khamaj "Do i still get a hug?", he asked. She smiled, and said 'of course.' And as she hugged him for what maybe the last time, she didn't want to let go. Her favorite thing to do, was to remember scents, and she took in his scent for the last time. As she turned to walk away, she locked in that scent and that moment. She wanted to run, she wanted to stand still, she wanted to walk away, but she also wanted to turn back and walk to him. He was joking right? In his usual way, that was so him, he was going to spring up from behind and hug her and say it was a joke. For a second, she almost believed that. But he didn't, because he wasn't joking. She'd only asked him that question because his silence and his aloofness had been bothering her. S...